Tefitoʻi Moʻoni ʻo e Ngāue Fakaetauhí

Meʻa ʻe Nima ʻOku Fai ʻe he Kau Fakafanongo Leleí

ʻE tokoni ʻa e fakafanongo moʻoní, ke ke ʻiloʻi e founga ke feau ʻaki e ngaahi fie maʻu fakalaumālie mo fakatuʻasino ʻa e niʻihi kehé, ʻo hangē ko ia ʻe fai ʻe he Fakamoʻuí.

Five Things Good Listeners Do

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Naʻe pehē ʻe ʻEletā Sefilī R. Hōlani ʻo e Kōlomu ʻo e Kau ʻAposetolo ʻe Toko Hongofulu Mā Uá: “Mahalo ʻoku mahuʻinga ange ʻa e fakafanongó ʻi he leá. … Kapau te tau fakafanongo ʻi he ʻofa, ʻe ʻikai fie maʻu ke tau fifili pe ko e hā te tau lea ʻakí. ʻE foaki mai ia kiate kitautolu—ʻe he Laumālié.”¹

Ko e fakafanongó ko ha taukei ia ʻe lava ke tau ako. ʻOku hanga ʻe he fakafanongó ʻo fakahaaʻi ʻetau ʻofa ki he niʻihi kehé, tokoni ke langaki ha fetuʻutaki ʻoku mālohí mo fakaafeʻi e Laumālié ke ne tāpuekina kitautolu ʻaki e meʻafoaki ʻo e faʻa ʻiló, ke mahino kiate kitautolu e ngaahi fie maʻu ʻa e niʻihi kehé.² Ko ha founga ʻeni ʻe nima ʻe lava ke tau fakaleleiʻi ange ai ʻetau founga fakafanongó.

1. ʻOange ha Taimi

ʻOku fie maʻu ʻe he kakai tokolahi ha taimi ke fakamāʻopoʻopo ai ʻenau fakakaukaú kimuʻa pea nau toki leá. ʻOange ha taimi ke nau kiʻi fakakaukau ai kimuʻa mo e hili ʻenau leá (vakai, Sēmisi 1:19). ʻOku ʻikai ʻuhinga e ʻosi ia ʻenau leá, ke pehē kuo nau leaʻaki e meʻa ne nau fie leaʻakí. ʻOua te ke manavasiʻi he fakalongolongó (vakai, Siope 2:11–3:1 mo e ʻAlamā 18:14–16).

2. Tokanga Ki ai

ʻOku vave ange ʻetau fakakaukaú he lea ʻa e niʻihi kehé. Fakaʻehiʻehi mei he fakatauvele ke huʻuhuʻú pe lele muʻa ʻetau fakakaukaú ʻatautolu ki he meʻa te ke leaʻakí he ʻosi pē ʻenau leá (vakai, Lea Fakatātā 18:13). Ka ke fakafanongo fakamātoato ke mahino kiate koe. ʻE toe lelei ange e tali te ke faí he ʻe fai ia tupu mei he lahi ange hoʻo mahinó.

3. Fakamaʻalaʻala

ʻOua te ke manavasiʻi ke fai ha ngaahi fehuʻi ke fakamaʻalaʻala ha meʻa naʻe ʻikai mahino kiate koe (vakai, Maʻake 9:32). ʻOku hanga ʻe hono fakamaʻalaʻala ha meʻa ʻo fakasiʻisiʻi e taʻemahinó pea fakahaaʻi ai hoʻo tokanga ki he lea ʻoku faí.

4. Fakakaukauloto

Toe leaʻaki e meʻa ne ke fanongo ki aí mo ʻene mahino kiate koe e ongo ʻoku maʻu ʻe he tokotaha kehé. ʻE tokoni ʻeni ke nau ʻiloʻi pe kuo mahino kiate koe ʻenau leá pea ʻoange ai kiate kinautolu ha faingamālie ke fai ha fakamahino.

5. Feinga ke Maʻu e Mahino Tatau

Mahalo pē he ʻikai ke mo loto taha ki he meʻa kotoa kuo leaʻakí, ka ʻokú mo lototaha ki he meʻa te mo malavá, kae ʻikai maʻuhala e ngaahi ongo ʻokú ke maʻú. ʻE tokoni ʻete loto mahinó ke holoki e loto hohaʻá mo e kumi ʻuhingá (vakai, Mātiu 5:25).

Naʻe akonaki mai ʻa Palesiteni Lāsolo M. Nalesoni ʻoku totonu ke tau “ako ke fakafanongo pea fakafanongo ke tau feakoʻaki.”³ ʻI hoʻo fakafanongo fakamātoato ke ʻilo lahi ange ʻi he niʻihi kehé, te ke ʻi ha tuʻunga lelei ange ai ke mahino kiate koe ʻenau ngaahi fie maʻú mo ke ongoʻi e ngaahi ueʻi ki he founga te ke lava ʻo tokangaekina ai e niʻihi ʻoku mou feohí, ʻo hangē ko e Fakamoʻuí.

Ko Ko e Fakafanongó ko e ʻOfa

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ʻOku hanga ʻe ha talanoa meia ʻEletā Hōlani ʻo fakatātaaʻi mai e mālohi ʻo e fakafanongó:

“Naʻe holomui māmālie mai hoku kaungāmeʻa ko Toloi Lāsaló mei heʻene tauʻanga kaá … Naʻá ne ongoʻi ne kaka e vaʻe muí ha meʻa. … Naʻá ne hifo ki lalo ʻo maʻu atu hono foha ʻofaʻanga taʻu hiva mo ʻOsitiní, ʻoku siʻi tokoto foʻohifo he laʻisimá … kuo siʻi mālōlō ʻa ʻOsitini.

Naʻe ʻikai siʻi lava ʻa Toloi ʻo mamohe pe maʻu ha nonga, pea ʻikai pē fiemālie. … Ka ʻi he taimi fakamamahi ko iá, naʻe hū mai … ʻa Sione Maninga.

“Naʻe ʻikai ke u ʻiloʻi pe ko e hā e palani ʻa Sione mo hono hoa ke ʻaʻahi ki he ʻapi ʻo e fāmili Lāsaló. … Ko e meʻa ʻoku ou ʻiloʻí, ko e faʻahitaʻu failau kuo ʻosí naʻe ala atu ʻa Sione Maninga ʻo fua hake ʻa Toloi Lāsolo mei he fakatamaki fakamamahi ko iá, ʻo hangē pē haʻane fua hake ʻa e kiʻi tamasiʻi ko ʻOsitiní. ʻI heʻene fai hono fatongia he ongoongoleleí, … naʻe toʻo hake ʻe Sione ʻa e fatongia fakataulaʻeiki ko ia ko e tokanga mo e tauhi kia Toloi Lāsaló. Naʻá ne kamata ʻaki ʻene talaange, “Toloi, ʻoku loto ʻa ʻOsitini ke ke tuʻu hake ʻo hoko atu e moʻuí—kau ai e malaʻe pasiketipoló—ko ia te u ʻi heni he 5:15am he pongipongi kotoa. Teuteu ki ai. …”

Naʻe talamai kimui ange ʻe Toloi kiate au, “Naʻe ʻikai ke u fie ʻalu he naʻá ku faʻa ʻalu maʻu pē mo ʻOsitini. … Ka naʻe vili taʻeʻunua pē ʻa Sione peá u ʻalu leva. Talu mei he ʻuluaki ʻaho ko iá mo ʻema talanoa—pe ko au pē ia ne talanoá—kae fakafanongo pē ʻa Sione. … Naʻe faingataʻa ʻi he kamataʻangá, ka ʻi he fakalau atu e taimí, ne u fakatokangaʻi hake naʻe maʻu hoku iví ʻia [Sione Maninga], heʻene ʻofa ʻiate au mo fakafanongo kiate aú, ʻo aʻu ki ha taimi ne toe hopo ai e laʻaá ʻi heʻeku moʻuí.’”⁴

Maʻuʻanga Fakamatalá

1. JeffreyR. Holland, “Ko ʻEku Kau Fakamoʻoní,” Liahona, Siulai 2001, 16.

2. Vakai, David A. Bednar, ʻi he “Panel Discussion” (worldwide leadership training meeting, Nov. 2010), broadcasts.lds.org.

3. Russell M. Nelson, “Listen to Learn,” Ensign, May 1991, 23.

4. Jeffrey R. Holland, “Kau Fakafofonga ʻo e Siasí,” Liahona, Nōvema 2016, 62.

Ngāue Fakaetauhi ʻo Hangē ko ia Ne Fai ʻe he Fakamoʻuí

ʻI he mavahe ʻa Sīsū mei Selikoó, naʻe kalanga kiate ia ha ongo tangata kui ʻo pehē, “ʻE ʻEiki … ʻaloʻofa mai kiate kimaua.”

“Pea tuʻu mai ʻa Sīsū ʻo ui kiate kinaua, ʻo pehē, Ko e hā homo loto ke u fai kiate kimouá?

“Peá na talaange kiate ia, ʻEiki ke ʻā homa matá.

“Pea ʻaloʻofa ʻa Sīsū, ʻo ne [ala ki] hona matá; pea ʻā ai leva hona matá, ʻo na muimui ʻiate ia” (Mātiu 20:30, 32–34).

Ko e hā te tau lava ʻo ako mei he founga fakafanongo ʻa e Fakamoʻuí?

Fakaafe ke Ngāue

Fakakaukauʻi e founga ʻe lava ke ke fakaʻaongaʻi ai e ngaahi tefitoʻi moʻoni ko ʻení ʻi hoʻo ngāue fakaetauhí. Fehuʻi ki he niʻihi ʻokú ke tokoniʻi pe ko e hā ʻoku nau fie maʻú. Fakafanongo ki heʻenau talí pea mo e ngaahi ueʻi ʻa e Laumālie Māʻoniʻoní. Ngāue leva ki he meʻa ʻokú ke fanongo ki aí.

ʻOku fakataumuʻa e ngaahi tefitoʻi moʻoni fakaetauhí ke tokoniʻi kitautolu ke tau fetauhiʻaki—kae ʻikai ke vahevahe pē hono pōpoakí. ʻI heʻetau ʻiloʻi e niʻihi kuo vahe mai kiate kitautolú, ʻe ueʻi kitautolu ʻe he Tamai Hēvaní ke tau ʻiloʻi e pōpoaki te nau fie maʻú, makehe mei heʻetau tokangá mo e manavaʻofá.