Marriage Prepares Us for Eternity—How Can We Do That While Single?

By McKell Jorgensen-Wells, M.S.

The doctrine of marriage can help us all progress on the covenant path toward exaltation, no matter our marital status.

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woman looking up at the stained-glass window of a temple

Photograph by Makena Easton

In the gospel of Jesus Christ, we frequently hear messages surrounding the importance of marriage. We know that “marriage between a man and a woman is ordained of God”¹ and that, through our covenants, we can be with our loved ones forever. This is a foundational part of the Lord’s doctrine.

For some, it can be hard to hear about this so often—especially if you want an eternal companion but haven’t found one, you don’t know if the person you’re dating is the one to marry, or you aren’t sure if you even want to get married.

But why is marriage stressed so much? How can you find meaning in the doctrine of marriage as a single individual? Sometimes people talk about things you can only learn from marriage, but God doesn’t limit your personal development based on relationship status, and marital status is not an indicator of your spiritual progression or capacity. Here are just a few ways you can apply the Lord’s teachings on marriage to your journey toward exaltation—regardless of your current marital status.

Create Meaningful Relationships

Humans crave connection, needing to both love and be loved. As a reciprocal, committed relationship sanctioned by God, and with both husband and wife doing their best to love and care for each other, marriage provides the relationship most capable of simultaneously fulfilling these needs. In marriage, you can connect with your spouse in ways unavailable in any other kind of relationship—you share your life, your dreams, your children, and your failures.

So how does this apply to you if you’re single or aren’t yet ready to get married? We know that relationships are important because we are commanded to “love one another” (John 15:12), to “strengthen [our] brethren” (Luke 22:32), and to “bear one another’s burdens” (Mosiah 18:8)—and that applies to all your relationships.

First, you can work to create close, supportive relationships with other people you trust and enjoy being with. Practice being authentic in these relationships, opening up to other individuals, and sincerely communicating your feelings, needs, and concerns. Deepen your relationship with your Savior and Heavenly Father and learn how They communicate Their love and support for you specifically.

Building close, Christlike relationships with friends, family members, and God can fill your life with meaning and joy. If you seek His help, God will help you create meaningful relationships that can provide the spiritual, emotional, and social support you need as you walk the covenant path.

Become More Christlike

One of our purposes here on earth is to grow and progress. And healthy marriages create an optimal environment for growth. ²

Relationships can be hard. People are different and imperfect, and no one enters marriage as a perfectly Christlike spouse. Fortunately, healthy relationships push us to become better versions of ourselves by requiring patience, love, selflessness, and other Christlike attributes beyond what we’re currently capable of.

We can all benefit from actively working to become a better partner in our relationships with friends, family members, and others. We can practice showing empathy, listening compassionately, and exercising patience and forgiveness with those we love. As Sister Neill F. Marriott, former Second Counselor in the Young Women General Presidency, taught: “Do we understand that Christ has the power to bring us into loving fellowship with the Father and with one another? He, by the power of the Holy Ghost, can give us needed insight into relationships.”³

We become more like the Savior—thus becoming better individuals and (future) spouses—when we strive to be like Him in all our relationships.

Live Exalted Lives by Making and Keeping Covenants

We are divine beings with celestial DNA. “Our theology begins with heavenly parents. Our highest aspiration is to be like them,”⁴ so we have the potential to become like our heavenly parents, creating worlds and posterity for all eternity. Temple ordinances allow us to progress along the pathway back to God’s presence, and their associated covenants help us to become the person we need to be in order to qualify for eternal life and live in God’s presence.

Exaltation includes both living with God and living like God. The sealing ordinance is the crowning ordinance in that it bestows upon us all rights, privileges, and blessings necessary to live like God.⁵

While entering the sealing covenant with a loving spouse is necessary for eventually becoming like our heavenly parents, individuals who haven’t yet been sealed to a spouse are in no way excluded from practicing living an exalted life today. You can live in a way that honors the sealing covenant, even if you haven’t made that covenant yet. You can attend the temple and keep all the covenants you have made. Honoring your covenants can help you find peace and develop a closer relationship with God, all while leading you closer to fulfilling your eternal destiny.

As Sister Jean B. Bingham, former Relief Society General President, taught: “There is nothing more important to our eternal progress than keeping our covenants with God.”⁶

You Have a Place in the Plan of Salvation

President Russell M. Nelson recently testified that “our Heavenly Father and His Beloved Son, Jesus Christ, love you. They are intimately aware of your circumstances, your goodness, your needs, and your prayers for help.”⁷ They know your frustration with dating, your fears and concerns surrounding marriage, your pain from doing all you are supposed to but still not having an eternal companion, or whatever else you may be feeling about marriage.

Eternal marriage is vital to God’s plan. You are vital to God’s plan. You belong in the gospel of Jesus Christ, and whether it feels like it or not, relationship status has no bearing on that objective truth. You can grow and progress and contribute to God’s work. Heavenly Father and the Savior will help you in your personal experiences and relationships as you press forward along the covenant path on your celestial journey.

God wants you to feel loved and hopeful, not stressed beyond belief about finding an eternal companion. Remember that as we strive to become more Christlike in all of our interactions and keep our covenants, we will be prepared to return to Heavenly Father and receive “all that [the] Father hath” (Doctrine and Covenants 84:38).