Digital Only: Answers from an Apostle
How Can I Overcome Fear and Uncertainty?
Let the knowledge of who you truly are and who is on your side extinguish all of your fears.
From a Brigham Young University—Idaho commencement address given on April 8, 2021.
I was one month shy of my 19th birthday when I arrived home filled with anticipation. There was an envelope with my name on it from Church headquarters waiting to be opened.
My heart jumped with excitement and anxiety when I read, “You are assigned to the Japan Fukuoka Mission.” I went back to work and announced the good news. I was going to Japan.
“Which mission?”
I could have pronounced Tokyo. I could have pronounced Osaka, but I couldn’t remember the name of the mission, and when I did, I didn’t know how to say it.
This plagued me over the next few weeks as I shared the good news with friends and family. A family friend who had just returned from his mission in Japan tried to help me memorize a short testimony in Japanese, but I just couldn’t do it.
My enthusiasm for missionary service was now accompanied with anxiety about learning the difficult Japanese language. Mentally, the hurdle was getting very high. My anxiety was turning into crippling fear, a constant companion.
It seemed this fear flew with me to the Brigham Young University—Hawaii campus, where the Missionary Training Center (MTC) for Asian languages was located. My fear was becoming a stumbling block. It loomed so large that it nearly consumed me.
I was getting up at 4:00 a.m. to try to get in hours of study before the regular 6:00 a.m. waking time. The adversary began to use one of his finely honed tools on me—comparison. Others were learning Japanese, and I was falling behind. I felt totally lost.
Fear is something we all possess. Let me introduce a couple of specific fears that we all face in some degree or another, with a thought about some antidotes that may help: faith and hope.
1. Fear of Rejection
Fear of rejection can be so paralyzing that it prevents us from taking bold actions necessary to succeed. We’re all subject to fear associated with rejection or failure.
Remember, this doesn’t define you. Strive to overcome that natural gravity that fear of failure or rejection causes. It stops you from pressing forward to find opportunities. “Be not afraid, only believe” (Mark 5:36).
2. Fear of Marriage and Family
Satan understands the family is central to the Lord’s plan of happiness. He is striving to sow the dark seeds of fear in your heart—anything to keep you from experiencing the most glorious, rewarding part of mortality, the bright holiness and happiness that come from finding an eternal partner and bringing Heavenly Father’s children into this world.
Be thoughtful and prayerful. Counsel with the Lord and with others you trust who have a gospel perspective as well, but do not take counsel from your fears.
3. Fear of Standing Out
As important as it is to find common ground, it is just as important to share gospel truths that are unique to the Church of Jesus Christ. I strive to do both of those things. Think of the unique truths of which we are able to testify:
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God the Father and Jesus Christ appeared to Joseph Smith exactly as he said They did.
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There is a living prophet on earth today.
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The priesthood authority that Christ used to establish His Church in the New Testament has been restored in these latter days.
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Dedicated temples are the house of the Lord. Sacred covenants are made there. Sacred, living and proxy ordinances are performed there.
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The Book of Mormon is the word of God.
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God the Father, Jesus Christ, and the Holy Ghost are real.
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Jesus Christ is our Savior and Redeemer.
The Antidote to Fear
Let me go back to my time at the MTC in Hawaii. I recall that after completing nearly half my time at the MTC, something changed. I remember adjusting my study time each morning to include more time reading and studying the Book of Mormon rather than studying only Japanese.
I knew my mission assignment was from the Lord, and so I determined that I would do my best and put myself in the hands of the Lord.
I quit worrying about how well others were doing. I set goals for myself. And I started achieving them.
Fear and uncertainty subsided. Faith and hope filled their place. This resulted in the study of Japanese developing into a passion with great enjoyment. Ultimately, I have spent nine years of my life in Japan, for which I am so deeply grateful.
As we work to move forward with faith and hope, there will be failures. You are going to take a few scrapes and bruises. There will be dark patches on the road ahead. But you are sons and daughters of God. As such, you have an inexhaustible divine source of strength burning inside of you.
“For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, … and of a sound mind” (2 Timothy 1:7).
“Wherefore, be of good cheer, and do not fear, for I the Lord am with you, and will stand by you” (Doctrine and Covenants 68:6).
The Lord’s promise to us is certain: “He that endureth in faith and doeth my will, the same shall overcome” (Doctrine and Covenants 63:20).
There is always hope. Let the knowledge of who you truly are and who is on your side extinguish all of your fears.