How can I keep the standards for relationships?
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“It feels hard to keep the standards when everyone I know is in a serious relationship with someone. What should I do?” For the Strength of Youth, Sept. 2021, 9.

Questions and Answers

“It feels hard to keep the standards when everyone I know is in a serious relationship with someone. What should I do?”


Ellie Joy Soulier

“Try to have an eternal perspective and spend time developing deeper relationships with your family and friends. These healthy patterns will draw others to you because they’ll see the best you—the real you!”

Ellie S., 17, California, USA

Seek Guidance

Jamie Gonzalez

“If you’re struggling with feeling left out, ask Heavenly Father for comfort. The Holy Ghost will guide you and be there for you. Also, you can always ask your parents and leaders for advice, because they’ve been where you are!”

Jaime G., 17, Nuevo Casas Grandes, Mexico

Make New Friends

Julia Salleh

“I’d remind myself that God loves me. Then I’d take the opportunity to get in touch with old friends, and I’d create activities to make new friends. You can use this time to build your confidence, talents, and testimony, and it will all work out.”

Julia S., 12, Alberta, Canada

Prophets’ Counsel

Julia Collings

“It can be hard to think about eternity when ‘right now’ seems more important. Remember that prophets and other Church leaders have strongly counseled against being in relationships in your teen years, even after age 16. Serious relationships when you’re young can lead to heartbreak and immorality. You can also ask Heavenly Father about what the best thing for you to do would be.”

Julia C., 17, Utah, USA

Get Involved


“A good way to feel included is to get involved in other things. Try out a new sport, audition for the school play, or join a robotics club. If you’re doing something you love, you’ll meet people you like being around.”

Mayah S., 16, Beijing, China

It’s Your Choice

“If you are already 16, you can choose if you want to go on dates. But when making that choice, do not think about what others might think of you. If you feel ready, then do it. If you are not, do not.”

Felipe M., 14, Rio de Janero, Brazil

Other Important Relationships

“Even though you might not be in a relationship with a ‘significant other,’ you still have good relationships with friends and family around you. Be grateful for those relationships. In order to strengthen them, be Christlike and a good example.”

Taylee L., 17, Utah, USA

Wait to Form Serious Relationships

“I like not being in a relationship yet. Some of my friends won’t hang out with me because they’re spending all their time with their boyfriends. I feel like I’m free to meet people without making important decisions too early.”

Gina C., 16, Nuevo Casas Grandes, Mexico

Don’t Pressure Yourself

“I’ve felt the same feeling, but praying to the Lord, reading my scriptures, and talking with my parents have helped me. We don’t need to feel pressured, because the Lord will help us know when it’s the correct time. Enjoy your life, and spend time with friends and family while you’re young! This period of our life only happens once, so don’t feel pressured to speed it up.”

Victoria G., 16, Nuevo Casas Grandes, Mexico