How Jesus Christ Brought Me Peace after My Mother’s Death
I had no idea where to search for answers.
During my last year of high school, my mother was ill. When she passed away, it was the most difficult period in my life. Her death ate away at my soul, and I fell into despair. I also had so much anguish about my future. There was no one to pay for my studies because my father was already retired due to his health. It was difficult to finish the school year, but my aunt and my older sister supported me until the end.
A few years later, I started really wondering about my mother’s current situation—where did she go? Was she still alive somewhere? Would she always be my mother, or was our relationship only for this lifetime? My questions were complex, and I started to doubt that I would ever find answers. I didn’t even know where to begin to find them.
One day I met up with a friend, and while we chatted, he let me know that he was a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints but didn’t go to church anymore because he wanted to make music. I told him that I often saw the missionaries pass by my house, but I didn’t know much about his religion. I said that I hoped there was something good in it because I needed answers.
I begged him to go to church together on Sunday. He agreed. At church, I was immediately touched by the love that the members had for me—they welcomed me as if we already knew each other. I had the feeling that I could find what I was looking for there.
A Change of Heart
The missionaries started coming to visit me. It was not easy at the beginning to learn about the restored gospel when I had already been taught differently. So, for a while, our lessons often turned into discussions about differing beliefs. But one day I told myself that I was the one who had questions I needed to solve—not the missionaries—so I had to give them time and room in my heart to teach me.
After that day, I began to experience a mighty change of heart (see Mosiah 5:2; Alma 5:14). I learned that my mother would always remain my mother, even in the life to come. I learned that we could be sealed together if I accepted the gospel and performed ordinances in the temple for my mother and all my family members who have passed away.
These truths penetrated my heart. When I started studying the gospel, especially the Book of Mormon, the truths I learned filled me with a radiant light. That light started to replace my despair from unanswered questions with a firm assurance in Jesus Christ.
Seven months later I was baptized. I wanted to do all I could to be reunited with my mother one day. But my family was concerned. I am the ninth in a family of 10 children. And when I tried to share the gospel with them, their hearts were not ready to receive the message. But I have hope that one day they will also gain a testimony of the gospel and how our family can be eternal.
Hope in Jesus Christ
The restored gospel has given me back the hope I lost for many years. I now see that life has meaning because I know my identity as a son of God, a child of the covenant, and a disciple of Jesus Christ.1
The gospel also brought me inner peace and the reassurance I needed when I lost my beloved dad in November 2020. I wasn’t troubled like I was when my mother passed away because I had the knowledge of the plan of redemption. I had also been preparing to serve a full-time mission. My call came the day after my father’s funeral.
Despite the devastating effects that gnawed at my heart when I lost loved ones, I now feel peace and joy in my heart thanks to Jesus Christ, His Atonement, and His Resurrection because I know that we can be forgiven of our sins. We can be reunited with those who have left us in this mortal life, and they will have glorious, resurrected bodies. I will see my mother and father again, and thanks to the ordinances of the temple, we will be together for eternity.
As Elder Jeffrey R. Holland of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles taught: “I testify that the future is going to be as miracle-filled and bountifully blessed as the past has been. We have every reason to hope for blessings even greater than those we have already received because this is the work of Almighty God, this is the Church of continuing revelation, this is the gospel of Christ’s unlimited grace and benevolence.”2
I know that the future will no longer be uncertain for me because of the rock on which I have built, which is Jesus Christ (see Helaman 5:12). I know that His ways lead to happiness in this life and eternal life in the world to come.