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Why is it important to follow the Church’s standards regarding dating?

Why is it important to follow the Church’s standards regarding dating?

Prepare Yourself Spiritually

Latter-day prophets have given us standards about dating to protect us from spiritual danger and help us prepare to one day find a worthy eternal companion. These standards include not dating before age 16, avoiding frequent dates with the same person, and dating only those who have high moral standards.

Resources to Help You Prepare

These resources are to help you prepare for the “Learn together” section of the meeting.

Questions to Ponder before You Teach

What examples have you seen that have taught you the importance of obeying the Lord’s standards regarding dating?

What experiences and ideas are shaping the young men’s perception of dating? What pressures are they feeling? What do they need to know in order to remain true to the Lord’s standards?

What can the young men do to prepare to learn? For example, they could read a talk, watch a video, or study a scripture related to this doctrine.

Teaching in the Savior’s Way

The Savior knew those He taught and who they could become. He found unique ways to help them learn and grow—ways meant just for them. When they struggled, He did not give up on them but continued to love them and minister to them. Pray to know and love the young men you teach so you can know what they need as you teach them about preparing for and finding an eternal companion.

Meeting Outline

1. Counsel Together and Share Experiences

Led by a member of the quorum presidency; approximately 5–10 minutes

Lead a discussion about items such as the following:

  • Our quorum: Who is missing today? What visits do we need to make? Who should we invite to an upcoming activity? Who needs our help and prayers?

  • Our duties: What assignments do we need to make? What assignments have we fulfilled? How have we invited others to come unto Christ, and how can we invite others now?

  • Our lives: Remind the quorum of the discussion from the last meeting. What experiences have we had with applying what we learned? What experiences have we had in the past few weeks that strengthened our testimonies of the gospel?

If possible, discuss these items beforehand in a quorum presidency meeting.

2. Learn Together

Led by a leader or teacher or a member of the quorum; approximately 25–35 minutes

After studying the above resources and following the inspiration of the Spirit, you may select one or more of the activities below to help quorum members understand the doctrine.

  • Invite each young man to write a personal list of qualities that he wants his future wife to have. Invite the young men to share their lists, as appropriate, with the class. Ask one of the young men to read the following statement by Elder Robert D. Hales: “If you want to marry a wholesome, attractive, honest, happy, hardworking, spiritual person, be that kind of person” (“Meeting the Challenges of Today’s World,” Ensign or Liahona, Nov. 2015, 46). As the young men review the lists they made, you might ask them how they would feel if their future wife had a comparable list about them. What are they doing now to be the kind of person that their future wife would want to marry? Invite the young men to discuss how they can personally develop these qualities now and how these qualities will affect the kind of people they date.

  • Ask each young man to select a word or phrase from the thirteenth article of faith and explain how his word or phrase relates to the standards in the “Dating” section in For the Strength of Youth. Ask the young men to share how the principles in the thirteenth article of faith should influence their interactions with young women.

  • Invite the young men to listen for and discuss their favorite advice as they read or listen to President Gordon B. Hinckley’s talk “Living Worthy of the Girl You Will Someday Marry.” What does President Hinckley teach about the choices young men make when they are dating? Ask them to write down some qualities they would like their future wife to have and select at least one quality from the list they can improve on to become the kind of companion they are hoping for. How could their dating experiences now influence the type of person they will eventually marry?

  • Show portions of “A Brand New Year: Dating,” and pause the video to allow the young men time to identify standards of dating mentioned by the people in the video. Ask the young men to review “Dating” in For the Strength of Youth and look for additional standards that were not identified in the video. Invite them to answer questions such as the following: What are the Church’s standards regarding dating? Why is it important for you to follow these standards? and What is the purpose of dating? Invite the young men to discuss ways they can respond when they feel pressured to do something that contradicts the Church’s standards regarding dating. Consider sharing examples of how you were blessed by keeping the Church’s standards of dating, and invite others to share similar experiences. Invite the young men to share what they will do to keep these standards.

  • Invite the quorum members to review the “Dating” section in For the Strength of Youth and write down any questions they have about dating. Invite a panel of older young men and young women to answer their questions and discuss the standards of dating. Encourage the panel members to include examples of how they have lived the standards as they have dated, such as dressing modestly, choosing appropriate activities, and dating those with high standards.

3. Plan to Act

Led by a member of the quorum presidency; approximately 5–10 minutes

  • Ask the young men to discuss any feelings or impressions they had during the meeting. What was meaningful to them? Is there something they can do personally or as a quorum to apply what they have learned?

  • Give the young men a few minutes to record what they will do in the coming weeks to act on their impressions. Invite them to share their ideas.

  • Remind the young men that they will have the opportunity to share their experiences at the beginning of the next meeting.

Related Youth Activities

Plan a Mutual activity that will help the young men apply what they learned in this lesson.