Comment

Secondary Victims

“A Refuge for the Oppressed” (January 1992) didn’t address the secondary victims of abuse—the parents, spouses, and children.

Though learning that my wife had been abused answered years of questions, coping with the horror of it has been the greatest trial of my life.

Her abuser appears to enjoy all the blessings of the gospel, seemingly unaware that we struggle daily with some of the consequences. I now know what Jacob may have meant when he wrote, “Many hearts died, pierced with deep wounds.” (Jacob 2:35.)

Name Withheld

Free Agents in a Telestial World

I had to say “thank you” for publishing “A Refuge for the Oppressed” (January 1992). I appreciate the fact that this topic and other controversial and sensitive topics are starting to get the much-needed attention they deserve. Since God’s children are free agents living in a telestial world, these unpleasant things occur even to the faithful.

Bless those confused and concerned family members who can’t second-guess the abuse victim’s latest bout with unresolved feelings that surface again and again, like relentless waves on a shore. Accolades to those survivors who hang on and endure family life, especially when living alone feels like the safest and most comforting thing to do.

May those of us who find ourselves suffering similar pains obtain comfort in the healing powers of our Lord, Jesus Christ. Through his atoning sacrifice in our behalf, we truly can be made whole by one who knows.

May we learn to forgive our trespassers and, in turn, cleanse ourselves from the damaging effects of something beyond the realm of our own agency.

Name Withheld

Random Team Selection

I would like to congratulate the Sparks Nevada Stake on the changes they have made in their sports program. (See “Sports and the Gospel: A Purpose Higher than Victory,” February 1992.) Their new attitude is worthy of emulation.

There is just one idea that might be improved on. When captains are chosen from each ward and alternately select players for each team, there will always be two players who are chosen last. That can be demoralizing.

I suggest a random form of selection—perhaps having players choose numbered slips of papers. Players with even numbers are on one team; those with odd numbers are on the other.

Jean Tolman
Leander, Texas

Update

A sentence in the article “Ordinary People in the Book of Mormon” (January 1992) read that “in preparing Jared’s daughter’s dowry—the severed head of her grandfather the king—Akish restored the practice of secret combinations and blood oaths.”

Unless Ensign readers read Ether 9, they will not realize that Akish was not successful in the plan to sever the head of Jared’s daughter’s grandfather, Omer, the king. Ether 9:2–3 states that “the Lord was merciful unto Omer, and also to his sons and to his daughters who did not seek his destruction. And the Lord warned Omer in a dream that he should depart out of the land; wherefore Omer departed out of the land with his family.”

Netta McDonald
Monticello, Utah

I Am Working

I would like to thank the woman who was courageous enough to write “A Refuge for the Oppressed” (January 1992).

I was sexually abused and saw myself in her article. I am still unable to talk about the abuse or forgive the abuser. I am working on it. This article gave me a reason to continue with my therapy. I hope one day to feel safety and love.

Name Withheld

I Got My Answer

Thank you for “The Blue Book” (January 1992). After I read the article, I started crying. I had been reading the Book of Mormon and praying to know if it was true, but it wasn’t until I read this article that I finally got my answer. I knew the Lord was answering my prayer.

Paula Phelps
Lloyd Neck, New York