Good afternoon. Good afternoon. Aren't you here? Can you hear me? Yes. OK. I didn't expect to see so many people. I thought by now you would be trying to go home and get a nap. [LAUGHTER]

Thank you. I am Dr. Deborah Abbott. I'm from Cleveland, Ohio. And I can't tell you everything that I do, or we'll be here until tomorrow. So I just want you to just kind of sit back. I'm not preaching to the choir. I don't want you necessarily to do the things that I'm going to tell you about in the order that I'm going to tell you about. I want you to think about yourself. The things that I'm going to talk about, you have to make it relate to you. And so this lecture, which is "A Gift of Life: Who's Writing YOUR Story?" Not your ancestor's, OK? You've done that already. But when--you have. You've done it already. So as genealogists, if you're like me, as you're researching, you get a little angry with those ancestors sometimes, don't you? You get angry with them because you want them to leave more records than you can find. You know, we're quick to say that they're not in a place where they are because you think they're hiding. And they're not. We sometimes, or most of the time, we want to figure out what their lives were like, how they felt. And you can't get those kinds of things from records. They have to leave something that will make you or help you to understand what it is that they did before you. You want them to tell you the whole story. You know, how angry do you get when you find an ancestor that you just thought had one husband, and they got two or three, and you got to sort them out, because they didn't think to tell you that ahead of time. OK? What about the ancestor that you've known as Aunt Mary all of your life, and then you find out her name is Gertrude? So when you write your story, tell us now that that's who you are. OK, you want the whole story, the entire story. You want to know everything that they've done. And I always say, tell me about that first boyfriend. How was that kiss? You can tell that story. Or when you first met your husband or your wife, did you like them right away? Maybe not. Maybe you knew that was the one you were going to marry. Then you married them, and then you weren't sure. So you need to tell us all of that stuff now. And then, we never know what kind of extraordinary things our ancestor did. We tend to think that they just sat in one place and didn't do anything else. You don't know whether they helped to build a bridge that you drive your car over every day. We don't know what they did. So this is the time for you to do that. When I decided that this needed to happen for me was I had two nieces. And we were out with my brother and my brother's granddaughters, and I said to one of them, let me go in here and see what my brother is doing. And she stared at me. She said, your brother? Who is your brother?

And I said, your grandfather. She said, he has a sister? [LAUGHTER] I said, yes, it's me.

And then I said, you call me Aunt Debbie. She said, I thought that was your name. [LAUGHTER] And I realized that we take a lot of things for granted. You know, of course when she grows up, she'll know who I am. But as that little child, she just thought that's what she's supposed to call me and there was no relationship in there. So course for the rest of the day, she kept saying, well, who's the oldest? And then she told her grandfather that I'm the oldest, so he has to do everything I tell him.

That was number one. And then the second time had to do with these kind of same nieces and nephews. And I realized that none of them know I've been married before.

So if they were going to do any kind of genealogy, I've got another name that they know absolutely nothing about. And I thought, I never talk about it, but I guess I need to, because they need to know. So I just wanted you to see this slide, where I have this wonderful marriage between two people, and then we have to cross somebody out. [LAUGHTER]

But I need to tell them that. I need to tell them what my name was, the time frame that I had a different name, because they don't know anything at all about that. They just know who I am, Aunt Debbie. That's it. They don't know anything else. So I'm suggesting to you, before writing your ancestor's life story, write your own. Decide that you are going to tell your family who you are. Keep in mind that what we do all the time--and this is how we research--we're in the present. And we work to the past. And we're digging up all those ancestors. And we're fussing, and I'm usually telling them off, you know, they're not leaving me what I need, and I got to hunt for something else, and it's costing me a million dollars. You know, they could have left that stuff for me, but they didn't. And then we do all of that. We do it all so that we can give it to our descendants. So we skip over ourselves. So those descendants, then, are going to turn into you today. And then they're going to be digging into records, and they're going to be fussing about you didn't tell them this and you didn't--you know, things that you just didn't think about, because you take that information from the ancestors that you researched, you take it over your head, and then you give it to your descendants. And you think you've just done a wonderful job. So now we're going to stop. You've done those ancestors. And believe it or not, as you talk about yourself, you can pull those ancestors in. You can pull that research that you've done on those ancestors when you start talking about the things in your life. So we tell ourselves that we will eventually write that book. I say that every day. I haven't written anything.

Every time I get started, I say, well, you know, I'll just wait on this. It'll come. And then I realized that what I might be able to do is just write a memoir. And I'm going to tell you how I started doing that and how I just do it in little segments. And I don't think about that book anymore. My little memoirs that I'm doing, I've got about 22 pages. I've got a little more than that. But if you wanted to look at it when we're finished, you can see how I do it. But I probably need to tell you, I'm not technology savvy. So I'm not using all that stuff that you use. I still have pencil and paper, OK? I still carry a notebook. I still write down what I'm thinking. And then I can transfer it to something else. So think about a memoir. A memoir is the story of your life. It's, I say, a small autobiographical writing. And it captures a period of time. It captures your past. It helps you to tell whoever's reading it how you feel. All of us probably have gone through the same events. But we've got different feelings about them. Same thing, but we feel differently about what's happening. So a memoir helps you to reflect on your life. Hopefully that's going to help you tell the truth, OK? And you'll be able to tell someone else how things have impacted how you live. So if you've lived through the Depression or if you lived through World War II, you've lived through Vietnam, what did that do to you? What did that do to your family? How did you feel? You know, I can't tell you what year it was, but I can remember having to go and stand in line and get that big block of cheese. OK, think about that. It made good macaroni and cheese, though. But those are things that our descendants know nothing about, absolutely nothing. And you can write little short paragraphs. And what I like about this is that I can write a sentence or two and put it down and then come back later and add to it. I'm going to read something to you, so bear with me a little bit. And this is my--I keep calling it an iPad. But this is my Nook. I got rid of the iPad. It was too hard for me to maneuver. So it's gone. I had one, but I was trying to be like the rest of you. Didn't work. But this is my Nook that I got from Barnes and Noble. And I read on this. But it has all kinds of apps and things on it. And one of the apps that's on here is called a memo app. Do you all have that? Because I think I'm probably the only one, that's what I keep saying. I got an invitation to go to Burlington, Iowa. I had a wonderful time up there. Coming from Cleveland and going to Burlington, Iowa, I didn't even know where it was. But I had to get on that little plane that you see there. And I wrote two paragraphs about going to Iowa. And I wrote it on the airplane once I got on there. Before that plane took off, I had written this. And I'm going to read it to you so you can see how easy this is. "The flight to Chicago was not smooth, but we arrived safely. The next leg of this trip is boarding Air Choice One to Iowa. In the airport, I had to pick up my luggage, take the train to terminal three, and check in again. "Once at the ticket counter, I was asked my weight. After I answered, the agent, he assigned me to seat 3B. The weight information, he said, was needed to help balance the plane." [LAUGHTER] "First clue I might be in trouble. At the gate, I was told that the plane was delayed because it needed fuel. Made me a little nervous. "Next, I found out that the plane only had eight seats. Now I'm really uneasy. When it was time to board, one of the pilots walked all five passengers outside to the plane, which was parked on the tarmac. "As I approached the plane, and you can see that plane, I stared with disbelief. It was so tiny. I climbed the stairs, entered the plane, but found that I could not stand up straight. So I just maneuvered to my combination window and aisle seat." [LAUGHTER]

I'm almost finished. "All of us are in first class.

There is nothing between us and the pilots, no door, no curtain, no nothing. A canvas hanging behind us hides both the carry-on and checked bags. Did I mention there were no snacks, because there was no stewardess and no bathroom?" [LAUGHTER] "After I was settled, I couldn't believe the seat belt didn't fit. So I had to have an extension to secure me in. But as usual, two men came to my rescue. "After the pilot made mention that this was a new and more modern plane and gave us safety instructions, we were ready to go. Fuel, two pilots, me, and four other passengers. Our flight never flew out of the clouds. White cotton surrounded me all the way to Burlington, Iowa. What an experience. Just keep the prayers coming, 'cause I'm going to sleep." [LAUGHTER] OK? [APPLAUSE] Now, you can write this same story about how long it took you to come in this room at RootsTech. You can write about your experience here at RootsTech, because when your descendants get it, they won't know what RootsTech is. And you can explain that to them. So the other thing I wanted to share with you, because I'm always--I'm working in these six-word memoirs. One of my friends at home, she did a lecture for our genealogy society. And she talked about writing in six-word memoirs. And I listened to her, and I thought, what can you do with just six words?

It's the story of your life. You can tell it in exactly six words. It helps to prompt your memory. And that's what I use it for--excuse me--to prompt my memory. So here are six-word--I call them life stories. "Life is living through the Rain." And that might prompt you to talk about something that was really difficult for you, and you overcame it. "Under the kitchen table, childhood memories." You ever was up under the table or in the closet and heard your family talking, and you got some information that you probably shouldn't have had? You found true love, but you married someone else. OK? And then this is mine. "Forgot password. Couldn't log on yesterday."

And I usually say this one, too. "Old too soon, smart too late!" Because if I'd known then what I know now, things would be a whole lot easier. And then I came across this six words from Paula Deen. "Might as well eat that cookie." [LAUGHTER] That would make me think about being on a diet, going to Weight Watchers, whatever it is that you're doing. I'm just going to have that one cookie. I want you to think about your life in motion. Think about it in motion. Remember your childhood and beyond. Look at photographs and heirlooms and newspapers. I want you to research you like you research your ancestors. What tools do you use for you? You use census records. You use newspapers. You use vital records. Pull all of those things for you. And while you're doing it, you can include your ancestors that you've already done. You can include them as well. Try to write in lists. The famous people that you've met, they'll never know that if you don't tell them. Favorite movies. Who's your best friends? And keep in mind that when you talk about best friends, you probably have someone who your children call aunt or uncle, and they're not. They're your best friend. So you might want to talk about that when you're writing your story. Write about your feelings. What made you laugh? What made you cry? And then just write it in small amounts.

This is a list of some of the people that I've met in my life. Can you see those? They're pretty small, huh? These are people that I have met, been able to have a little conversation. Too small to have a conversation with John Kennedy, but I was close enough to touch him. OK, so these are people that I've met. Saw Smokey Robinson at the National Archives. That was really a good experience for me. And of course, now, when I see anybody, I take a photograph. So I have a photograph at home. These are some of the places where I've traveled. People think I stayed home all my life, but I haven't. I've been some of everywhere. I just couldn't put everything on this slide. I couldn't put all the places I've been, I couldn't put all the people that I've met, on this slide. So I want you to think about that. I want you to think about, you know, where you've been. Talk about your experience there. And just so that your descendants will know. Let's look at some historical events. These are mine. I have lived through the assassination of Martin Luther King, of John F. Kennedy. I can tell you exactly, right now, where I was and how that felt, OK? I've lived through the election of the first black president of the United States. I can tell you how that impacted me and how I felt. And to watch my aunt, who was 90 years old, tell the doctor when he asked her, who's the president of the United States? And she says, oh, that colored fellow. [LAUGHTER] She never thought she'd live to see that. She said--I kept saying, you know his name. She says, that colored fellow. He's the president. OK, so I can write about that. And you see to your right, I got four pictures of the royal family. There is not a document out there will tell you how fascinated I am with them from the time I was 14 years old. There's nothing about them I can't tell you about. I stayed up all night and watched Charles marry Diana and William marry Kate. And then I watched them have those babies. And I claim those babies now as my grandchildren. [LAUGHTER]

I know all about them. But nobody will know that if I don't write it. I'm a Cavaliers fan. I'm from Cleveland. And I will do whatever to go see a Cavs game. And in my young days, it would be nothing for me to drive from Cleveland, Ohio, to Chicago, Illinois, to watch Michael Jordan. There's no record that's going to tell you that. I have to do the telling of that story. I've lived through, on your left side at the bottom, that's the shooting at Kent State University, where I wanted to go to school. And my mother said, no, you can't go there, because that happened just as I was coming out of high school. Can't go there. We've lived through 9/11. Where were you when that happened? I was at work. And I said, oh, my, we've been attacked. And they was letting people go home early. And I thought, well, you know, this is a good time to go to Home Depot. Won't nobody be in there. And that's what I did.

So I went there, and everybody else went home. I remember when the Beatles first came to the United States. And that chandelier--Cleveland has lived through, right now, a revitalization. We have hung a crystal chandelier in our theater district. It hangs over the street, over Euclid Avenue. It is simply gorgeous. So think about the historical events that you've lived through. Here's one we've all lived through--first man on the moon. Where were you? Were you watching television? Were you at somebody else's house watching television? How many people were watching that one little TV? Alright, what about the sonic booms? Do you remember that? I don't hear any noise. The sonic boom's before your time.

You got me by a couple of years. Alright. [INAUDIBLE] I was at a wedding, in a church, waiting on a groom to come. He didn't show. Sonic boom went by, and everybody in the church say, here he comes. [LAUGHTER] I have written that story. Now, I wanted to write a story a little bit about the evolution of the computer. You know, we used to have typewriters. We had manuals. I don't know what we had before that, but we had manuals. Then we had electric typewriters. We had carbon paper. We don't have that anymore. But as I was searching, I came across the television, because that television in the middle, I had at my house. Yes, that television was at my house. We had that television. So I said, well, let me just look and see what televisions looked like so long ago. And then, as you can see in that left-hand corner at the top, you got rabbit ears. All right? You are looking at a person here who has the flat-screen TV that's down in the left-hand corner with rabbit ears.

My television has rabbit ears, because there's no cable there. That costs money.

And I get 43 channels--you need to know that--with my rabbit ears. And then I found this picture of me as a little girl with my brother. I always had to handle him. We're standing in front of a television. And I couldn't figure out what that thing was on top of it. It's a clock. [LAUGHTER] That's a clock.

Alright, think about this. Think about your childhood. Think about what things you watched on television, what programs. These are my programs. And I wanted you to see Paige Palmer, because we used to ask--my mother used to exercise with her, but can you imagine exercising with stilettos? [LAUGHTER] She's exercising.

And television--I lived through a period of time where there was very, very few African-Americans on TV. And when they came on, Lawrence Welk and Mitch Miller was the ones that we had to watch. And we couldn't talk until Arthur Duncan finished dancing and Leslie Uggams finished singing.

Now, if you need help on your decades, this website is called CrazyFads, crazyfads.com. Does it in decades. And you can get a little hint of what you might need to do.

It goes back to the '20s. So here's a sample. In the '50s, 3-D movies, carhops, Frisbees, hula hoops, letter sweaters, panty raids, poodle skirts, saddle shoes, sideburns. '20s to '40s, bright red lipstick--and we doing bright red lipstick today--dance marathons, drive-in theaters, flappers, hood ornaments, miniature golf, monopoly, radio shows, and zippers. Think about that. Also, as you do this work, you're going to act like you're researching your ancestor, and you're researching yourself. I used the Cleveland Public Library to help me try to reconstruct the things I needed to talk about myself and make a history out of it. Make sure you go through all of your tabs on your library site and see what's there. And I show you the two tabs that gave me the most help for my stories.

Here's my six-word story. That's the title of my, quote, memoirs, or my book. It's only six words. My Life Best Told In Chapters. Now, I'm going to show you the chapter titles. I wrote all the chapter titles without writing anything about them. The titles are set up so that when I look at them, I know what I'm supposed to be talking about. So chapter one. It's all about me and how I came here and if everybody was all excited that I had come--probably not, but you never know. "Big Bed, Wonderful Memories, Happy Days." I'll be writing about my grandparents, the things that happened with them. "Always An American, Therefore I Can"--my elementary school principal. "I've Taught You All I Know"--my mother. "My Family, A Circle Of Strength," so I'll talk about that. Oh, I didn't want to talk about this one but I guess I will. "My Heart, My Soul, My Love." Nobody knows who that is till I put it on that paper. I'm a graduate of Tuskegee University. When I went there, it was Tuskegee Institute. The best choice I ever made. And then, "My Life As It Has Evolved," because I'm really surprised sometimes where I've come from and where I am today. "Keep Your Eye On The Prize." I was reading a newspaper article, and one of the columnists was talking about Thanksgiving. And this was one of the things that she talked about that keeps you moving forward. And I wrote a story about it. I did write that one. "Finding My Roots, My Genealogy Family." That's you all. "Friends, You Only Have A Few." And I've completed that last chapter, which is "Last Chapter, New Address, Beautiful Place." I have written everything I think I need to do for my death. And I've done that. So here we are. That cute little girl is me, just in case you didn't know. But when I started doing this, I realized every picture that I have at that age, I have on that dress. Wonder if that's the only one I had. I look so much bigger than everybody else in those other pictures. The one to your right, with me and the little girls, that's me and my nieces, two of my nieces. And then that's me down in the corner with my mother, and I got on that same dress. But I went to the 1940 census. And I looked at the 1940 census, and I saw my grandfather and realized that this is a six-family house. I didn't have to realize it. I lived in that house, alright? This is long before I was born, but I knew everybody that was on that census, because I lived there, too. I wanted a picture of that house. Make sure you try your library, because Cleveland Public Library had a picture of that house. They have a picture of every house that Cleveland was demolishing. I didn't know that. So I was able to get a picture of that house. I pulled my own birth certificate, alright? And then I found out where I used to live, where I was born. And so I went to the Cleveland Public Library, and they had the picture. And now I know. I'd never seen this place before. This is where I was born. Then I went to the newspapers. And there was a column called "Stork Talk."

Everybody that's in there is listed by the name of their father. But because of the date of the newspaper, I know that's me. OK? Here I am in that same dress. [LAUGHTER]

I wanted to know what the weather was like. I learned that from John Caleta. Make sure you know what the weather is when you're putting your ancestors in a time and a place. I went to the library. I reconstructed my old neighborhood with the Sanborn maps. The librarian helped me do that. And then I placed the houses--well, I really went to the city directories, and I labeled all those buildings using the city directory. Alright? But you see where I lived on Central. That's that house you saw earlier. My elementary school was on the corner. And then on the next street over, which is Quincy Avenue, there were three families over there that we are still friends today. We went to elementary school together. Look at my great big elementary school. It's torn down. Everything I'm showing you is torn down, so nobody would have it if I don't tell them about it.

And I've talked about this already. This was my principal. She was really trying to make something out of us little black children. Her brother was Martin Fuss, who we know as Ross Hunter in Hollywood. And he would come, and he'd give us these talks. And we didn't know why we was listening to him or who he was or why he was there. I know now. And from that elementary school, second grade on up, there we are, still friends, still taking care of one another. And we've got two people missing. They were there, but they didn't get in our picture. So as you can see, there are eight of us that never came apart from that neighborhood. Here I am, a little naked. I found that picture, and I said, they couldn't even fill up that pool all the way. But anyway, there I am. And I know where it is. And Cleveland Public didn't have a picture of that house, so I drove around till I could find it. And they were getting ready to demolish it. And so that's what you see. And I took the side of it because that's where I'm sitting, on the side of that house. Then I gathered up the houses where I'd lived as a child, OK? All these houses are gone. They're all gone. Here are my grandparents. I have this bed at my house. I used to think that was the biggest bed you ever seen in your life. But it's not. But as a child, for me it was. And it was a bed that you only were able to go into if you were sick. My grandmother would let you go into that room, and she'd put you in that bed. And it was just--it has good memories. You couldn't act like you was too sick, because my grandmother made cough syrup, and we wanted it because it was sweet. So we would go around the house coughing. But you had to do it real light, because if she really thought you was sick, not only would you get this, you would get--you'd have to eat that VapoRub, that Vicks VapoRub. And you really didn't want--right, she knows. On the back of your tongue. She's got it. So when they talk about Vicks VapoRub, and it's not good for you, OK, well, I've lived through it, and I'm still here. [LAUGHTER]

Here's my grandfather. And you see me. And he used to--I used to go to the house, and I'd run up to him, and I'd say, I'm here. And he would pat me on my back and say, when'd you get back? And then he'd pull my nose and say, I hardly knowed you. And he'd pull my earlobe and say, ain't seen you in ears.

And I'd just giggle and go on. I did that every time I went to that house. Here's my mother. My memories--we ate cream of wheat every single day.

But she put surprises in it every day. Ice cream, raisins, bananas, strawberries, canned peaches, brown sugar, cinnamon. We wouldn't know what's in it until we stirred it up. We had to stir it up to see what was inside of it. Never had a birthday gift. Only thing I could have was my birthday dinner, anything I wanted. So I always had chocolate cake and ice cream. I had fried chicken. You always had to have a vegetable, so I had spinach. Rice and gravy. When I turned 10 and a half, or seven and a half, you got a cupcake with a candle in it. Those are my memories. You have holidays. I chose Christmas. When I realized Santa Claus couldn't come through that chimney, because he was too fat, we had to put a key under the mat for me. But we used to leave sugar cubes for the reindeers and Coca-Cola for Santa Claus. And we'd make cookies for Santa Claus. And then when he would come, before I could go to the tree, I'd have to clean his mess up.

Crumbs everywhere. [LAUGHTER] Crumbs everywhere. He'd even gone into the freezer and got the ice tray, and ice is out everywhere. But the sugar cubes would be gone. We had a silver tree, not a green one. And you had that strobe light on it. Remember that? OK. Alright. And then I have Cleveland State University near me that has the Cleveland Press newspaper collection.

It hasn't been digitized, so they have to go through it. And they have the photographs, all the photographs for the Cleveland Press. And I knew that I had written a letter to the Cleveland Press when I was a teenager. And they found it. And the column was called, "If I Were Principal." They sent it to me. I couldn't believe I was on the principal's side. You know, I was saying everything he did was right and the students was wrong. And I couldn't believe it. But I did. I researched the newspapers. And I found me in an honor society. I don't remember when any of this was taken. And I wouldn't know to tell anybody if I hadn't researched myself. Then I found this, and I was really upset, because it brought back old memories that was painful. I should have been this homecoming queen. [LAUGHTER] I lost by two votes. I had forgot all about it till I found this article.

Then I had an opportunity to go overseas as a high school student. It was the first time that they were taking or sending students out of the inner-city schools. And I was one of those students who got to go. And I found all these newspaper articles about it with my name in it. And it says that I'm one of the participants. We're going abroad, 41 of us. And then when we came back--we were gone for about two months, and when we came back, we had this big party, and all of that. I don't remember any of it. But the paper said I had a good time. [LAUGHTER] And I definitely don't know who these people are. That one in the middle is me. But I have no idea when we did this or why we did it, except for I got a big airplane on my chest. Don't know. [LAUGHTER]

Alright, I've got to hurry up. My time's going to be up. And anyway, I found in the newspaper ads I come from a family of business people. Here's my Tuskegee and Kent State connection that I like very much. And here is me at work. So if you know that where you worked had newspapers and things, you need to try and look at that. Here's my cemetery. This is where I'm going.

I am going to--that's my urn. I bought it. That's it. But I did this as if it was some real estate. I talked about looking in the living room, which you see all of the niches in there. And then down at the bottom to the left, you know, that's the great room. And then to the right at the bottom, that's my granite foyer. I got a circular driveway. [LAUGHTER]

And so here is my last chapter. I'm one mausoleum away from President James A. Garfield. Rockefeller is my neighbor, and Garrett Morgan and Carl and Louis Stokes and Eliot Ness. My family is there, too. I'm not going to read all of this, but I do want you to know that when I did this, I listed where I will be. And I listed the grave and the section of every member in my family on this so that whoever gets this next will not have to hunt for those graves. Then I decided, well, go to the other cemeteries and get all the other graves. So I did that. So I can't tell you when I'm going to get there. But I'll be there. And you can come and visit me. I look forward to your company. [LAUGHTER]

So you have books that you can get to help you with these memory prompts, legacy journals, and memory keepsakes. These listographs I use for seniors a lot. But you can use it, too. You need some inspiration, you can write it out. You can use these books. A lot of these I have in your handout. And if you want to do it, Sunny Morton is--that's her book in the front. That's that Story of My Life. She's in the vendors area. So if you wanted to see and look at that book, you can. And then, if you just want to read some stories that'll make you laugh, OK, they are really very good. Do you see the one that says, I'm Down? That's a white family whose father had decided that he was going to be black. It is hilarious. Look at that little girl. Does she have some stories to tell? But there are all kinds of things out there, all kinds of books to help you overcome that writing block. And for me, the memoirs help me with that writing block. So just remember, history is the past--it's not the past. History is the present. Facts get recorded. Stories get remembered. So what's your story? Thank you. [APPLAUSE]

Thank you. [APPLAUSE]

Thank you. [APPLAUSE]

Thank you. [APPLAUSE] OK, I want you to get to work. [LAUGHTER] Get to work.